Looking for your “Why” can become your friction in your 30s. Instead, listen to yourself, and craft your future.

You can’t choose your “Why”, your “Why” chooses you.

I became aware of the concept of the “Why” from a TED Talk about the Golden Circle by Simon Sinek. The idea is so inspiring. I started to ask myself what mine was. In the end, I saw it emerge from my past like the Venere of Botticelli. It leads me to:

  • Have an explicit action to take in every second of my life
  • Recognize accomplishments in the past
  • Inspire others to make the same

The “Why” is not an outcome, but a process

When you describe your “Why”, the biggest mistake is focusing on results. Instead, focus on the process.

I know: you saw inspiration from the Greats, and you want the same for yourself. But you can’t know what’s behind someone. You have to rely on a frictionless “Why” to guide every decision to create success.

You want a safe haven from your “Why”. The best strategy is looking inside.

Here is how I found mine:

Dig into your past to find your future

List 3 good events and 3 bad events from the past.

  • Track a line of your history and choose the 3 events where you felt accomplished or happy.
  • Then, do the same with the 3 worst moments.
  • Then focus on why you chose these 6 events.

Your past makes you vibrate, listen to it and eliminate the friction.

Ask yourself the motive again and again until you find the core. You will recognize this because you’ll notice a vibration that keeps increasing. It’s your spirit coming from yourself.

CONGRATS: you found sense in your past.

Track the pattern in the 6 points.

Finally, describe the union of the points with a sentence that implies action. It is the process to follow, your “Why”. Test it and see if it helps you choose.

My “Why” is “Trigger Talents to Create a Better World”. I hope this essay triggered you. Now it is your turn to create a better world.

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Matteo Cervelli | People Gardener 🧑‍🌾

🪴 Cultivating fertile environments for leaders to trigger people’s blooming 📝 Writing on strategy + coaching + parenting 👨‍💼 CEO midsize org. | Father of 2