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How Hard Is It To Lose Compassion With Your Partner While Raising Kids
Just a little scream between moments of happiness and misunderstanding
We started yelling at each other for a bathtub not emptied.
We finished with unfinished phrases, not intending to harm the other, but indeed jittery. We felt like each other stopped to step into the partner’s shoe.
I can’t say when the flywheel of anxiety started to turn, but I can’t explain how hard it is to feel isolated in your own house with the girl you have loved for 17 years.
“Take time for yourself”, they said.
That’s a phrase some can tell while drinking a beer or on the beach. But when you hit your foot with the toddler rocker while the five-month-old is moaning, it’s also impossible to decide what step to take next.
Breath and meditate. No way.
Are you kidding me? How can I possibly meditate if, when I wake up, my place has books piled up from 3 days?
“You have to be happy”. I am, and I am not.
It is my fucking right not to be happy sometimes. We fought so hard to have babies. We lost two. I remember every cry in the night…
